Forgive

Lately I’ve been asked about the topic of forgiveness a lot and it even came up in a teaching at church recently, so I thought I would jot down a few things about the subject since it keeps coming up.

The funny thing about forgiveness is that it seems that we all know that God expects us to forgive others when they wrong us. In fact, the questions I get about forgiveness often start with this phrase, “I know I should forgive, but…”. Yes, scripture says that if we are to receive forgiveness, then we must forgive others.

Matthew 6:15
But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. NIV

Matthew 11:25
when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins. NIV

It seems that people are all too willing to forgive, until someone actually offends them. And the same person who chooses, yes chooses, not to forgive and to hold bitterness against someone is most likely the same person who cannot understand why others refuse to forgive them when they wrong someone. Truthfully, who among us has not wronged someone else either by doing something thoughtlessly, or purposefully, or by saying something in the wrong way? I know I have been wrong many times and I have been wronged many times.

Jesus said in Matthew chapter 5, “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy”. I know I need a lot of mercy. This scripture is interesting however, because the literal meaning of the Greek word here for “blessed” is “oh how happy”. Have you ever noticed that a bitter person is not a happy person? Why? Because we were designed to choose peace and not bitterness. The human condition called bitterness, or unforgiveness is a state we were not designed to be in. Our psych wards and counselors couches are filled with those who simply choose not to forgive and thus drive themselves to emotional illness. Now, don’t get me wrong. This is not the only reason for mental illness, but it is a major contributor. This is why Paul admonishes us in Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

Did you notice Paul says, “as far as it depends on you”. God wants us to choose peace. He wants us to be “oh how happy”. He says, do your part. We are so busy focusing on the one who did not do his part, but God says, that doesn’t matter. You do your part. Let God worry about the other guy. Why is it that we are only willing to do our part to live at peace when the person really hasn’t done that much to disturb the peace. It’s the ones we truly need to forgive; it’s the ones who steal our joy; it’s the ones who truly have wronged us that we need to forgive. We need to come to that place where we truly decide that the one who wronged us truly owes us nothing. It is me that I am hurting when I choose not to forgive and truly no one else.

We’ve all seen that person who walks around with a scowl on their face looking like they’ve been sucking on lemons all day. They walk into a room and bring a dark cloud with them. I don’t want to be that person and I’m sure you don’t want to be that person either. How do we change it? We choose peace. We choose to forgive.

Colossians 3:13
13 Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. NIV

I know that I need mercy. I know that I have been forgiven much by God. I know that I need the joy of the Lord to be my strength. All of this adds up to the fact that I need to be merciful as my heavenly Father is merciful. I need to forgive.

Until Later,

Don